Baby Duck

We live by a semi large body of water, legally described as a wetland, that is home to a variety of wildlife. Herons, geese, ducks, muskrats, cranes, coots, turtles, snakes and frogs would call this home. This is the time of year when the waterbirds' eggs hatch and our body of water fills with goslings and ducklings, carefully and sometimes aggressively tended by their parents. Yesterday, I noticed a sole baby duckling, brand new, still fluffy, swimming bravely up and down the perimeter of this water, no parents in sight. It's soft peeps calling out to find one to own it, defend it, care for it. It went on for more than an hour, until I could no longer bear to watch. I tried to call to it, with human peeps, bits of cracker, but only served to frighten it even more. Without guardians, this baby duck would probably not survive the cool night or hungry snapping turtles. It's fragile little life, so soon begun could as easily end in a single day. Yet, in this, is the reminder of the order of things in this life. We live in a world God created, full of dangers yet also joys. But He is no errant duck parent.  Our every peep is heard by Him, and He calls back to us. If we listen carefully, we can find Him, and be safe.

To be loved

My life as a child was sometimes lonely and chaotic. I often felt unloved and unimportant. As I grew up, without realizing it, I had set my life's single goal to love and be loved by someone. When I met my to be husband at 20 years old, I decided that he was going to be that someone. Every decision I made from then until now focused on maintaining that goal, to love and be loved by him. If something I wanted to be or do threatened that relationship, I dropped it. To his credit, my husband understood his role in fulfilling this goal, and has been a man of integrity, kindness and faithfulness. As our lives together enlarged to contain children, friends, in-laws, the fruit of choosing to love and be loved is all around us. Resting in the comfort of this love drowns out all of the strident voices in the world wanting me to buy this, or do that, look younger or try harder. The voices create targets that are far away, hard to hit, full of disappointment. The target to love and be loved is all bullseye, there is no failure in it. It is God's plan for us, to love and be loved. As He loves, we love, as we are loved by Him, we are at peace.

Play

For the past several weeks, since Traveling Light, I have been apparently stuck on "pause". Stuck in a state of disbelief, going 'tharn', as described in Watership Down. Going through the motions of life, without living in it. Yesterday as I was starting my day, it came to me, in the soft voice of God, that I needed to resume living. Part of that living is finishing some projects that have been put away, gifts for my daughter. Part of that living is making plans for the summer, painting the room I am readying for Collette. All of that living is putting one foot in front of the other and continuing my journey on this dusty road, being present for life's events with my whole heart. How odd it is to stay in a frozen state, watching the world and not sure when, or if, you will ever have the energy to rejoin the game. Yet, this evening I was able to make some crazy tie dyed pants and put them in an envelope to get to Florida by Saturday. I am not really sure how it happened. It is a beautiful spiritual mystery.
God took my soul off Pause and pressed Play. 

Happy Face

It takes an inordinate amount of effort to rise above certain of life's circumstances. It is like lashing together a raft, in a torrential downpour, to bring yourself across raging water to a safer shore. To some, it may seem like an unnecessary chore. Stay on this side of the river, feel the rain, never mind the cold and the mud that seems to be dragging you under. Feel the defeat, we will understand. Oh no, not defeat. It will not take me. I will construct a raft, I will lash together what I have left of strength. I will put my happy face on. I don't want to feel the pain, or the heat of tears or grieve my lost days. I want to run the rapids and stay afloat, I want to see where I have to go. I want to plant my feet on solid ground again. Until that day, I will dress in colors, running my happy little raft flags up the pole. Share that ride with me when you can. I am always glad for the company. But don't let me cry, then I can't see where I am going. Put on your happy face.

Project Congo

I walked my first ever 5K today, to support a project I  found out about in March. A woman named Sylvia, an ER doctor in Dayton, has made it her mission to assist a small medical clinic in Goma, a refugee city in the Democratic Republic of Congo. She assists mainly by raising awareness, encouraging donations of money, medicine and medical equipment to help the 6 Congolese staff members of the clinic attend to the needs of thousands of refugees in the area. You can see the amazing things that have been done in Goma since Dr. Sylvia got involved  by visiting the website: www.projectcongo.org.  What can one person do to impact the huge problems destroying lives in our world...well, you can see with your own eyes what one person can do. One person can tell another person, who tells another person, all pooling resources of time, money, expertise and hope to bring that construct to restore lives. I noticed that only 1355 visitors have been on Project Congo's website...maybe 200 people were running/walking the 5K today. So it doesn't really take very many people to make a very big difference. There is so much to do.

Sunny Day

Yesterday was such a beautiful sunny Sunday. Breezy, 75 degrees, perfect for a long walk to the ice cream store for a small Thin Mint ice cream cone. Today it is cloudy, stormy and rainy. Of course it is spring in Ohio, and that is how spring is here. It is transition time. Unpredictable, sometimes violent, sometimes balmy. We keep our umbrellas handy, not sure it is quite time to put away the winter coat, ready to till the garden but not ready to plant. Life seems to go that way most times, sunny one day, dark clouds the next. Our lives transition from age to age, seasonally lifting, settling, calm then storm. We keep our eyes on the sky, hope in hand, making plans but also contingency plans. The sunny day that starts with clouds, predicted cool temperatures, but warms up to wonderful, is a gift that is not soon forgotten. It's the promise that the storms will abate, and we can put our chair cushions back on the porch furniture and relax. That sunny day waits behind every cloud, our hope in each tomorrow.